Apologies, this week has been absolutely nuts for me.  But here it is, the conclusion to Tuesday’s post!

Inara Serra: The only member of the crew to have a legitimate profession outside of the ship, Inara brings a certain level of respectibility to Serenity.  While Mal often mocks her choice of a profession, Inara seems to do well as a companion, completely transforming her shuttle into elegant living quarters.  She is extremely compassionate – a trait probably enhanced from her years of training – and cares deeply for the crew.

When Inara first joins Serenity she makes it clear that she never intends to service anyone in the crew, and she holds to that – she’s happy with her living arrangements and doesn’t want to complicate things. While she is very friendly with the crew, she rarely takes a role in their jobs, and is normally away with a customer while the rest of the crew is taking part in their sometimes shady dealings. As such, we see very little of how she handles under stressful situations.

What we do see of Inara’s confrontational prowess, though, is that she prefers to diffuse a situation with her words before it comes to blows.  We see numerous times that she attempts to calm an enemy (or, occasionally, another crew member) using her feminine wiles and companion training, and she uses her respectibility as a companion to get the crew out of trouble.  She uses her contacts within her customers to get help when the crew needs it, and convinces a client to bend the rules in order to help the crew get away from some particularly vengeful enemies.

Verdict: Slytherin

Shepard Book: We know very little about Shepard Book’s past, which makes it hard to sort him properly.  He is very devout, but quite accepting of all of the crew just as they are.  He tries to settle things diplomatically, but has been known to help fortify and defend himself, the crew, and anyone else under his protection if necessary.  He’s also extremely knowledgeable on not only his chosen faith, but the specifics of others.

When we first meet Book, he is looking to go on a journey, and doesn’t care about the destination.  He swears to defend those he believes defenseless, even if they turn out not to be.  It seems as though he’s searching for something, but we never really find out what.  Whatever it is, though, he puts it on hold when he joins the crew, as they accept him and give him a new mission in life.

It’s clear that Book has some sort of violent past; he’s far too familiar with weaponry to have spent his entire life in an abbey.  It’s possible he was once connected with the Alliance, as he’s still got clearance with them to access their medical facilities when he’s wounded in a gunfight.  From what we see of him in Serenity, he fights for what he believes in, no matter the cost.

Verdict: Gryffindor

Simon Tam:  Had Simon been able to stay in his comfortable, successful life as a doctor on the core planets, he’d be a Ravenclaw, no question.  Top three percent of his class, and a  brilliant doctor even under pressure, Simon had it made.  But there’s one defining thing about Simon that makes all of that meaningless – his love for his sister.

Simon does some extremely brave, yet admittedly stupid things to rescue his sister.  Giving up everything, defying his parents and the law to try to save her – those are more brave than stupid, but trying to get himself lit on fire and getting himself shot fall more on the stupid side. 

Even with the crew, Simon is very reserved, always worried that they’ll turn against them and turn them over to the Alliance (to be fair, he may not be completely wrong in his suspicions, in regards to one crew member).  But most of them like having a doctor on board, and think that Simon’s actions against the Alliance to save his sister were very noble, and they’ll do what they can to protect them.   

Verdict: Gryffindor


River Tam: River is the brilliant, broken younger sister that Simon has given up everything to rescue, and her smarts show through even her bouts of insanity.  Sadly nowadays it comes out more in random trivia (about the ship, about how to kill people, etc) than in ways it could be useful, but Simon works tirelessly to find ways to fix the damage done to her by the Alliance.

We know that as a young child, River was exceptional.  She excelled at everything, and even pointed out when Simon’s textbooks were incorrect.  She chose to go to the Alliance school where so much damage was done, chose it because it had the most exciting and challenging program, and she loved to learn.  While there, she was able to outsmart the teachers and get notes home to Simon, begging for help.

Much like Ender in my last sorting, River’s intelligence would have been used as a pawn in someone else’s game, had Simon not intervened.  She’s led to believe that the program she enters is good for her, and there are many that would use her skills to benefit themselves.  In the movie, we even see the crew using River’s unique gifts to protect themselves – something Simon is furious over.  River can take care of herself, but with her mind so fractured, it’s sometimes hard for her to realize when to do so.

Verdict: Ravenclaw